Staring Overly Long at the Honey

The man in the grocery aisle staring overly long at the honey containers - that's probably me. We have to try and save money on our food bill. Now, how much was the honey per oz. at Kroger compared to Aldi compared to Target? These are the questions of the day. (Ok, maybe we shouldn't be considering honey in the first place, but it is our home remedy for allergies. If you are saying that is a old wife's tale, just imagine me as Billy Crystal in The Princess Bride with my hands over my ears, screaming out, "I'M NOT LISTENING, I'M NOT LISTENING!")

We are trying to discover what works best for us with regard to buying groceries, meaning good, wholesome and with the least expense necessary. For us, good means buy organic when possible, fresh fruit and vegetables will still be staples, and everything else is up for discussion.

We have found some really good deals at Aldi. I bought a pint of blueberries (nonorganic) for $0.99, a loaf of whole grain bread for $.69 and the big container of their brand of Quick Oats for $1.99. Sometimes at Kroger we can take advantage of their specials to buy items we like at an excellent discount. Other times, for specific items we see that WalMart or Target is consistently cheaper.

I know that Blake and other financial gurus say that we should just buy what we need for the week (or two weeks or month, etc, depending on how well you plan in advance I guess). We try to take advantage of stock-up specials, though, believing that it will pay off in the long run. Is our thinking flawed?

What about you? What are the ways that you have "gone cheap"? I really would like to know what you have found to be the best bargains with regard to laundry and dishwasher detergent, soaps, etc.

Remembering Teen Wolf

There is a scene in Teen Wolf where the Michael Fox character is bemoaning his lack of coolness or lack of popularity or his ordinariness (it's been a long time since I have seen it), and he says something like, "I get $8 haircuts," meaning that his haircuts aren't very good. This was a shock to my system, something that I had never considered. I remember wondering at the time, how would a more expensive haircut look better?

I still don't have an answer to that question, but I think I have discovered another haircut fact. You may be able to tell when someone has gotten a $0 haircut.

I wish all barbers well, but I really don't like spending money on haircuts. As part of our money savings campaign, I made a $35 investment and bought an Norelco electric hair razor, promoted as a "do-it-yourself" appliance. This may not have been a good move. I cut my hair on my own a few weeks ago and now that it is growing out a bit, I think I am seeing how irregularly I must have cut it. Or am I? Any self-cut hair experiences out there?

If I were younger none of this would not be a problem. I would just continue to grow my hair and become a teen wolf myself.

Jesus Dreams and Losing Everything

She waited outside the classroom door after class. Salma (I am not using her real name) is from the Middle East, an intelligent, friendly, confident woman. I saw her standing in the hallway and greeted her, unsure if she was waiting on me (I was the last one to leave the classroom) or if, maybe, she was waiting for someone else.

She was waiting for me. She returned my greeting, then almost immediately, began to tell me her story, starting with this attention-grabber: "Jesus came to me in a dream." Several years ago I had read in a Christianity Today article that there were reports of Muslim who were seeing Jesus in their dreams. My daughter, Kourtney, who worked in Guinea, a West African Muslim country had told us that there were Muslims there who reported the same thing.

After this startling announcement, Salma told me the rest of the story in her broken English. She was a rich woman in her home country, married to a prominent man. For years she had been attracted to Christ and his message of love. She had read the Koran extensively and was repulsed by the emphasis on violence that she saw there. On the other hand, when she had read the message of Jesus, she was drawn to him in a very deep way. In the end, she could not resist him. 

After telling her husband that she was now a Christian, her husband threatened to turn her into the police, which meant that she would be sentenced to death. Salma took the threats seriously, fled the country with one suitcase in hand, and after a journey that took her to several different countries, she had ended up here in the United States where she is seeking asylum. At this time she has no contact with her children. She must not. Salma is convinced that to do so would jeopardize their lives and the family who has taken her in.

As Salma told me her story, full of joy and loss and sorrow, I kept staring into her face, trying to comprehend what she was going through, amazed at this biblical-like account of sacrifice that was here before me. Her sacrifice for Christ reached every part of her existence: she has lost family, friends, security, possessions and country. But she has gained Christ. And she knows him deeply in a way that I don't.

After my conversation with Salma, it is a little more difficult to worry if the Rangers are going to win their next ball game or if the Mavericks will play again this year. Salma shows me that there are more important concerns to fill my heart and mind.

Starting Over: Changes You Don't Want

Starting Over: Changes You Don't Want: "This morning I will be going to Richland to teach my ESOL Reading class. Denise will be going to work, then to the funeral of our dear frien..."

Changes You Don't Want

This morning I will be going to Richland to teach my ESOL Reading class. Denise will be going to work, then to the funeral of our dear friend, Lyndle "Rich" Wilcox.

There are some changes you embrace. Teaching international students at Richland is part of a change that allows me to be God's servant to those who don't know Christ. I am so happy and so blessed to have this new ministry.

But there are some changes that you hate, that you never want to see, even if you believe, like I do, that God works for the good for all those who love Him.

And did Lyndle ever love Him! And she loved me, and she loved Denise, and she loved her family, and if she knew you, she loved you. She was a force of nature. Or better, she was a force of God who had learned early on to take everything she was and everything that she was given and turn it to love.

We met Lyndle in the early-mid70s. We were all apart of a circle of friends, most of whom were part of the Hawn Freeway church of Christ,  centered around a love of God and love for each other. My first and lasting impression of Lyndle was that here was a humble yet vibrant witness to Christ's love.

Denise and I were beneficiaries of that love. Lyndle shared her life and her biscuits with us, babysat our children, prayed and praised with us in tiny apartments and big church buildings. As time passed and Denise and I moved around the country, then around the world, Lyndle kept in touch with us. The last we communicated was on June 30 - July 1 when we exchanged facebook messages, saying that we needed to get together. We will.

Lyndle loved her brother Dale and her niece, Jamie, and her nephew, Daniel. She was the kind of sister and aunt that everyone wants to have - loving, forgiving, playful and wise. She would have made a fantastic grandmother. But most of all, she loved Rick, the husband that God sent her. How much I know that it grieved her that she and Rick, at first, could not share that love with children, but, then, God blessed them with Angel and Zera.

God will bless Rick, Angel and Zera. I know that He will. From the foundations of eternity, he gave them Christ. A few years ago, he gave them Lyndle. He will not leave them without blessing now.

I know that this change is a good thing for Lyndle, and I am truly happy for her.  But I really don't want to live in a world without her. So, I keep telling myself, it will not always be this way. 

Maranatha. Lord come quickly!

Pleasures of the Poor

Last night all the grandkids and all of the married daughters spent the night at our less than 2000 sq. ft. house. It was chaotic. We are a loud and dramatic bunch with everyone talking over each other, kids screaming with delight or screaming because they are mad - in any case, always screaming. At one point, I asked Kayla, my oldest granddaughter if she wanted to go for a walk. We went (ahhhh, a little peace and quiet) with two of the moms and walked a couple of miles along the greenbelt.


The kids all slept together in the one living area that we have. Our four daughters filled up both the upstairs rooms. Downstairs, we pushed back the sofa, moved the coffee table, inflated a couple of air mattresses, gathered pillows and read books and told a Bible story (Samson and Delilah was a real thought provoker and scandalized my daughters, especially when I concluded the story with "And they all died" - btw, the kids slept just fine, thank you very much). It was crowded and loud and wiggly and perfect. It reminded me a lot of when my cousins and I would stay at each others' homes in the summer and we would all sleep in the same room. We just enjoyed being together.

When I went to bed, I thought about how I was glad, at least for that moment, that we didn't have a big house with separate bedrooms for all the kids.

The United Nations

This week I started teaching my ESOL Reading class.  I have students from all over the world in the class, but they primarily seem to be from the Middle East and Asia.  I have 19 students who all can speak and read English but not very well. I am excited every day about being able to help them learn English, and every day I pray for God to let me be a servant and ambassador for him.

I love seeing people from different countries coming together and communicating with each other in a friendly way for a common purpose.  (One day every nation and every tribe will be doing the same thing:).  I would love to have your prayers about this class that I lead four times a week.  I want to take advantage of my opportunities to be His ambassador to this assembly of the UN.

Shamed

Denise and I have tried to live our lives without a "love of money." From the beginning of our marriage we have intentionally tried to not let money determine our decisions. This is a negative way, though, to think about your life. Instead of living "free from a love of money," we are called to live as servants of God. He, not money, is our Master, as Jesus makes clear.  In any case, I am completely shamed when I read Jesus' comments about a woman who truly lived without consideration of her own welfare, who knew her God in a way that I want to know: "she out of her poverty has put in everything she had, all she had to live on" (Mark 12). She is a hero and role model for us.

Cutting expenses, part 2

When Denise and I packed up everything and went to Italy with our two preschoolers, Kaley and Kassie, a lot of people would tell us what a great sacrifice we were making. It never felt like a sacrifice. It’s true that we gave some things up and there were the obvious things that we missed - family, friends and peanut butter – but God gave us new family and other foods. We never lacked for anything.

So far, it has been the same principle at work in our “financial sacrifices.” We are giving some things up, but our lives do not feel poorer in the least. It is actually kind of exciting.

Here are some more things that we did to help make the next two or three years easier financially:

·      We dropped our cable bill and use antennas for our televisions.

·      We dropped our telephone landline.

·      I gave up my Droid for a little LG phone that my son-in-law, Luke, let me have.

The total savings here works out to be about $160 per month. Like I said, it has not been a sacrifice.

Here is what we have found: using indoor antennas, television reception in HD today is a lot better than back in the day when we only got analog. The reception is not perfect: we cannot get every channel without adjusting the antennas. But once adjusted, the picture is at least as good as what we got with cable. We have also found that some of the cable shows that we are interested in, like “The Closer” and “Falling Skies,” we can still get via computer with a cable that goes from our computer directly to our HDMI television input.

It has been annoying for some time to pay for our landline since almost all of our calls come to us via our cell phones. I asked around to others who had given up their landline and found no one who had regretted it.

Occasionally, I miss having wireless access and the apps I had on my Droid, but I have not missed it much. I never used my phone to play games or “kill time,” so I was never “addicted” to it in the first place.

So, what have you cut back on to save on monthly expenses? What other expenses should we be thinking about cutting?

Cutting Expenses, Part 1

We knew that it was going to be tough financially for the next three years or so while I worked part-time and went to school full-time. So we had some things in place and have tried to do some additional things that would mean lower expenses. Here are a few of those things:

·      We have no credit car debt.

·      We have no house payment.

·      We have no payments on any of our three cars (2007 RAV, 2009 Prius and 1999 Camry.

·      We have a new high efficiency air conditioning unit, radiant barrier, insulation and soffit vents.

About 20 years ago in anticipation of this time we refinanced our home on a 15-year note (yes, that’s right – we literally were thinking about this time, when our girls would have graduated from high school). It has helped a lot in paying for college expenses and getting car notes paid.

We buy low-maintenance, low operating-cost cars. We don’t want to spend any more money than we have to on transportation, but, on the other hand, we want as reliable cars as possible so that we don’t have to spend a lot of time maintaining them. There are a lot of good cars out there. Buying Toyotas has worked for us.

Our central air and heating unit was 25 years old. Over the years we had to make a few repairs, but the only major component that we had ever replaced were the coils. I figured that the compressor was due to give out at any time. Also, the unit had never cooled well during the hottest part of the summer. So, when there was a state rebate and a federal tax credit offered this past winter, we bit. I knew it was an upfront expense, but I also believed that we would make up the money eventually in lower electric bills and if we did not replace it now, odds were it would be breaking down at an inopportune time when we could not get the tax break and rebate - and might have to pay for the unit with credit. We also went ahead and got insulation, radiant barrier and soffit vents installed. These were upfront expenses that I am very glad that we made. Our last electric bill was $87.

Next, we cut our television and telephone expenses.

But what about you? Any places that you have cut expenses that could help the rest of us?

A Budget! - Part 2

We  went through one month of living on a budget, and we made it - but not without a few adjustments. We are still figuring out what we really spend on different things. After a month I have confirmed at least one thing that I thought would be true: we eat a lot!

As a beginning budgeteer, I have a question for the pros: How do the rest of you categorize Walmart or Target or grocery store expenditures when you get items that should go in separate categories? For example, we may buy 10 grocery items and five toiletry items and two lawn and garden items. Do you actually break it all down with tax or do you just have, for instance, a "Target" budget?

A Budget!

I hate to admit it, Blake, but I don' think that Denise and I have ever lived by a BUDGET. This will probably be news to our kids. I think all they will remember is how cheap we were. Oh, well.

Now we are keeping track of every purchase and every expense. Basically, we are living off of Denise's salary. Mine, such as it is, goes to my school tuition, fees and books. Through scholarships, loans and work, Kendall is paying for most of her expenses in MALIBU (ok everyone, let's feel REAL SORRY for Kendall:), but we have some money set aside to help her if she needs it.

Any wisdom about budgets out there?

I am using Mint.com to make a budget. It isn't perfect but it's free. I am wondering if anyone has any experience at using this website as a budget tool or if they have other budget tools that they use that are FREE (that has become a very important word around our house:)?

The Crowne Affair, Part 2

It is June, and it is hot here!

But not as hot as it was in 1980.

In the summer of 1980 Denise and I sold most everything that we owned, packed eight suitcases (two for each member in our family at that time) and moved to Italy where we bought a travel trailer to live in. We went so that we could share the gospel with people who lived in the cities just south of Naples and north of Sorrento, from San Giorgio to Castellamare.

It was scary. We were doing something new. We knew that we wanted to share the gospel with people who did not know God and who were not disciples of Jesus, but we had never tried to do this outside of the United States and outside of a church structure. We were going to start churches in areas where we knew of no established Protestant churches (in the three years that we worked there we met a few believers but no local churches.) Financially, we knew we had to depend on the grace of God to "make ends meet." There was no financial backup plan to the support money that a handful of small churches and individuals were sending us and no financial reserves.

This time feels a lot like it did back then. It is a little scary.

We believe that we are doing what God wants us to do. Ever since I was an undergrad at UT-Arlington, Denise and I have felt like that there were two things that we were being called to do with both of them involving work with the "poor": First, to do cross-cultural mission work.; second, to work with college students as an English instructor. In both things, we had the same purpose: to share the gospel with those who did not know God and were not disciples of Jesus. 

Now we are working on the first phase of project #2: get the doctorate so that I can fulfill the ministry that we believe that God has given us. The financial part of this makes no more sense for us than it did in 1980 when we sold everything we owned - except, I think,  for a rocking chair, a wedding gift from Scott and Jan Homesly - and moved to Italy. But our life is not about finances. Never has been - by God's grace, never will be.

So why did I leave Dallas Christian School even though there is tremendous need there and many opportunities of ministry? For many years Denise and I have talked about this time coming. Now it is here. It is time to begin work on project #2.

The Crowne Affair, Part 1

            Ok, this post has nothing to do with The Thomas Crown Affair – neither the one with Steve McQueen nor the one with Pierce Brosnan. Mainly, I just wanted a catchy title. But the title does have to do with Larry Crowne, the Tom Hanks’ movie that is coming out today. Haven’t seen it but I understand it involves someone losing their job and going back to college. So there you have it. I quit my job and am going back to school.

            Some people start school after working for 30 (or more) years because they have been laid off their jobs (as in Larry Crowne). That is not what happened to me. Last spring I decided that the 2010 – 2011 school year would be the last year for me to work at Dallas Christian School.       

            Last year in my work with students I was able to do a lot of things that I felt honored and privileged to do. For example, I was able to listen to a student, who felt too ashamed to speak to others, share with me about how God's love had saved her from mental illness, to counsel with a student who felt like the death of a relative was his fault, argue for life with a student who believed that abortion was a "live option" for her, share the gospel with a student who believed that they could never be right with God (this student had written me a note with a final message, "Please help me.").

            These were some of the ministry highlights for me because I was clearly in a position to do what I believed that God called me to do at Dallas Christian School: be Jesus’ person to help kids in need. Obviously, these are not the only needs that existed in our school community. But these were desperately felt needs and I was glad that I was able to be there to serve.

            So why did I leave? More in part 2.